Be enthusiastic about new things. Teach your child that new things can be exciting and fun. Some children are scared of new experiences, so tell them that new experiences can be fun and teach them new things. Give your child a heads up when they will try something new so they feel prepared and excited. Try the new activity yourself first, to show them that it’s okay and even fun to do, then invite them to join you. [11]
Prepare your child for new experiences by talking about it beforehand. For example, if your child is nervous to go to a birthday party, say, “Birthday parties are lots of fun! While you might feel shy, I bet the other kids will be friendly and want to play with you.”
2
Show that new experiences are safe. An anxious child may feel fearful about trying something new. If your child is nervous to try something new, go ahead and demonstrate the skill or activity for them or have a sibling or friend try the activity first. Tell your child that they are safe and everything will be okay. [12]
For example, if your child is afraid to go down the slide, go down first and show them that it’s fun. Then, go down with them. Finally, let them try by themselves.
3
Help them talk about their fears. Encourage your child to talk about what scares them and why they feel scared. Empathize with them and show them that their feelings are okay and valid. Then, let them come up with ways to overcome their fears. Let them do this on their own as much as possible so that they feel in control of handling their fears. [13]
For example, if your child is scared of going to school, let them tell you about what scares them while you listen and soothe them. Then say, “What do you think might make you feel less scared?” Let them give some responses before offering suggestions.
4
Help them gain competence when they struggle. Your child might struggle in a certain area (like reading) and try to avoid it. If your child is struggling to learn and wants to give up, continue to encourage them. Praise their efforts and not their outcomes. Even if learning is hard, your child can still feel accomplished and proud of themselves. [14]
If your child wants to give up, point out their progress. Let them know that even if they’re not where they want to be, they’re beyond where they started.
For example, if your child struggles to tie their shoes, encourage them to keep trying. Be patient and give a few gentle pointers, but don’t tell them exactly how to do it.
5
Allow them to make their own mistakes. Fixing your child’s mistakes for them will discourage them from trying and show them that minimal effort will get the same result. Instead, be patient and encourage them to be, too. Tell them there’s nothing wrong with trying a few more times. You can even demonstrate how to do something, while not directly fixing their mistakes.
For example, if your child is having trouble tying their shoe, tie your own shoe to show them how it’s done. Have them follow alongside you or try again after you’re done.
